If only everyone would just hurry up and change so that we can finally be happy. Without being fully aware of it, that's what most of think about our nearest and dearest, even the wider world around us.
And how frustrating is it that we cannot change people and the world (yet, everything is constantly changing🤔)?
Expecting others to change is often a source of stress and conflict.So let's indulge that fantasy and imagine if your partner/child/parent/sibling/friend/colleague actually did become how you want them to be. How sublimely, dreamily, delightful - right?
Suddenly, there'd be peace, harmony and... utter boredom.
Not only that but we’d get new, unexpected problems, like taking each other for granted, loss of individuality or becoming (even more) self-righteous and think we can project our desires onto everyone & everything (hello, dictators); or no one will challenge us when making daft decisions then we end up with a face like Madonna's. Or our business suffers, or, ironically, we find ourselves in relationships that are unfulfilling but we stick around because it’s easy & comfortable.
Furthermore, we’d miss out on all the essential triggers and opportunities we need to learn and grow. Yawnful but true.
We unfortunately need people to piss us off and press our buttons. And more importantly, we all know how it feels to have people try to change us. And we all know the reality that trying to change other people is not only futile, but renders us the the makers of our own suffering. Our best option is either to change our reactions to them or move to Bali😉.
Comments